Anxiety Girl’s Annual Gratitude List

  1. “This is only a test of the emergency notification system.”
  2. A husband who removes arachnids and insects and who doesn’t tell me about the bigger critters.
  3. Modern medicine and the pharmacy in my bathroom cabinet.
  4. The car’s check engine light comes on, but it somehow coasts all the way home and dies in the driveway and not in the middle of nowhere.
  5. A father who would sit in his teenage daughter’s bedroom and watch back-to-back (-to-back-to-back) episodes of Friends while she goes through a breakup.
  6. The work meeting that ends without me having spilled coffee all over the conference table, the minutes I was taking, and myself.
  7. PureGreen24
  8. The tornado warning for our area has expired.
  9. A boss who says, “Why don’t you take off before the roads get bad.”
  10. Hand sanitizer.
  11. “In the case of a real emergency, this message would contain further information and instructions.”
  12. Natural fiber blankets that don’t conduct electricity.
  13. The aroma of bread baking, cookies fresh from the oven, or a good ol’ fashioned pomander rotting by the litterbox.
  14. Mom’s words of wisdom, available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, completely free of charge. “You’re not sick.” “Don’t worry about it.” “Stop thinking about it.” And my all time favorite: “I’ll tell you when to start worrying.”
  15. Life’s little distractions: a consuming work of fiction; Seinfeld reruns; word games; unraveling and restitching a knitting project; Bubble Safari.
  16. People of the Internet who will direct you to seventeen thousand different home remedies for whatever ails you (real or imagined).
  17. Seeing a gang of turkeys gobbling across the backyard and realizing their life is probably tougher than mine. And shorter.
  18. The calming scent of baby sunscreen.
  19. Waking up in the middle of the night before Thanksgiving and NOT having a panic attack.
  20. “This is only a test.”
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6 responses to “Anxiety Girl’s Annual Gratitude List

  1. So funny, and, yet, I can seriously relate to them all (except for 8 and 19). I hope the paparazzi near the litter box doesn’t scare the kitty or kitties!

  2. LOL! Sillyliss!! I love your dad, I love your mom (I’ll TELL you when to start worrying), and I love your car. Please mail them to my house ASAP! Thank you very much! 😀

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