1. There is no talking while watching Full House. If you talk while watching Full House, we will watch it again. Until you don’t talk. Which means we will watch it again. And again. And again.
2. When the sappy lesson-learning music comes on, nobody say “aw.”
3. No laughing. It’s not funny and I don’t get the joke.
4. You sit on your side of the couch, I sit on my side of the couch, and never the twain shall meet.
5. Remember that one time when Michelle did that cute thing?
6. Be quiet. It’s starting. Quick. Get up and dance on your side of the sofa! Shout the names! DJ! Stephanie! Uncle Jesse! Joey! Danny! Aw Michelle!
7. See #1.